Friday, July 29, 2011

Gabba Gabba Che! The EveryT has arrived!

In the synergistic spirit of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup™, the Clock-Radio and the Industrial Whaling Harpoon / Soft Serve Ice Cream Machine [patent pending, Dimco Industries] we proffer to you the EveryT!
 Tired of choosing among your t-shirts as to whether you want folks to know you support:
1)    a shuttered New York City punk music landmark
2)    a band that helped make the former a cultural landmark, all the while wanting to be sedated.
3)    an English proto-speed metal band whose proclivity for narcotic accelerants is matched only by their brain crushing volume and the renowned wartiness of their front man.

4)    a Communist revolutionary guerrilla doctor who rode a motorbike all through South America, helped Castro oust Batista from Cuba and ended up having his hands cut off by the CIA for his trouble?

Well now you don’t have to choose!
If you were to buy all these shirts separately you could pay up to $845! (Although we suspect the folk at the Mall saw us coming.)
And then if you wore them all at once you’d have to constantly rotate the top one so everyone could see all of them (we’re guessing it would get kinda toasty too.) 
Also, you would look like a jackass.

Now you can look clever, spiffy AND stylin’ all in one quality garment.  Our internationally renowned team of talented textile beautifiers have whipped up some top-drawer graphical alchemy and combined four (FOUR!!!!) iconic tees into one ├╝ber-tee to rule them all.*

*Your ability to rule may vary.

We know you’re gonna want to look your best when Greenpeace™ takes a video of you enjoying a chocolate / vanilla (see? synergy again!) swirl waffle cone with jimmies right after you fire an explosive harpoon into the side of (one of the few remaining) Balene whales.

The Dimco Industrial Whaling Harpoon / Soft Serve Ice Cream Machine, the only explosive harpoon and dessert delivery device you’ll need.

Err, rather:

EveryT, the only T you’ll ever need.

(Buy two though, so you can wear one and wash one)

EDIT! The EveryTee is now available here